hospital cares

Well what a week it has been! Has been mixed with pleasure and pain - mainly daughter's pain which is harder than own to go through. Spent a very pleasurable weekend with mum and brother which was just perfect. I love entertaining and having people to stay, so was in my element! Although I do note that the sugar and coffee supplies diminish faster than I can replenish them! But ABSOLUTELY worth it all. They arrived on the friday and left on monday so lots of time to sun in the garden, visit the forest, have a BBQ, catch up on the gossip and generally sup wine and have fun.


Monday dawned very early as I was worried about impending surgery and wanted to get the most of the time left with brother and mum , although mum did not rise until alot later! I let her off though as she was very good one night, talking to H at 1 am and sorting him out - so can't be too critical! Spent some time putting world to rights and lots of coffee and chats with bro as preparing to go to hospital with E the next day which I was not looking forward to. Eventually they had to leave and E and I left for York to stay with a friend before going on to the hospital.


We actually had a lovely time with our friends and rose early, despite the rose wine! Did not get alot of sleep and read until the early hours but woke early enough to drive to the hospital in good time. We had to be there for 7.30 to go to theatre about 9.00. There seemed to be alot of hanging out in the playroom with few toys and books but E did some colouring and it was a good distraction for us both. Eventually though we were called to put E into pyjamas and walked to the theatre which is so different to how things were when I trained to be a nurse (20 yrs ago!)

It was a relaxed induction into anaesthesia and I left as she fell asleep. It was nerve wracking because we did not really know what she would need doing but she had been having problems with severe tummy aches for over a year so we felt something needed sorting out. She was gone for nearly 4 hrs. I managed to drink lots of coffee, have frantic phone call from hubby who was very lost and threatening to turn around to go home, have other calls and messages from friends and brother but the time passed slowly......... I kept going back to the ward for progress reports but none were available and the staff were not keen to try to reassure me by ringing down to see how things were going. Again I would have tried everything to reassure anxious parents but instead I just felt like I was in the way and went back to the canteen to brood longer over my daughter's fate and how it was all somehow my fault that she was in there.


Eventually we did get to go and see her in the recovery and the relief was immense. We had a prior visit from the surgeon who gave us a positive progress report and said that all had gone well. She had key hole surgery which had just left 3 holes - no stitches or large openings which I was dreading. If she had been in alot of pain I would not have been able to bear it for her but luckily I didn't have to. She was fast asleep in recovery and would not wake but the recovery nurse said she had been and could go back to her bed on the ward.


It was not long before she woke up and gave us a frown then a smile - if you know her that is just how she is! Was so relieved - let hubby off to get a sandwich then drive home again to collect others. This was the start of my time in solitary ,where I was only spoken to at handover times and treated as a nuisance if I wanted anything else. Although the nurses were lovely - just misinformed. They need to realise that being busy doing "nursey" stuff is not what it is all about - you need to spend time getting to know your patients - then you can be more effective in your caring. That first evening I managed to pull her drip out so we had a bit of a blood bath whilst trying to change her bed after a huge wee which I was mortified by - being a nurse who should know better! However, I did feel that maybe she was having too much fluid being as she was swimming in it! Probably did her a favour and at least she did not get a swollen hand which she did last time she was in. All in all probably not the worst thing I could have done!


Luckily the ward was situated next to the new and funky cafeteria - hugely expensive but with comfy chairs and Latte which is a must when in stressful situations! Thank goodness too for my friend who visited daily as she was working there in the hospital - it just kept me sane and gave me someone to off load onto (being as the nurses were totally disinterested!) I had thought I would be able to regale them with tales from my nursing and that they would look on with admiration and in awe of all my years experience but I was robbed of this opportunity and subject to complete indifference, worse - disinterest - the worst thing! I guess it serves me right for trying to dine out on my daughter's misfortunes but I know that years ago the nurse looking after us would have made it her business to know the ins and outs of our lives. It was a lonely time, being far from home and with little support - a friendly word would have gone a long way.


My friend and I thought we would test the nurses and their curiosity by planting some books that she had given me for work which could only mean I was something in nursing - but even this little taster was met with no interest whatsoever! I was relishing telling them that I was a sister but just did not get the opportunity to air this knowledge! The disinterest was at such a height that the nurse looking after us did not even check E's wound before discharge or give me any information about caring for her once home. I think possibly it was a very busy ward but I do think the time that they had could have been better spent speaking to their charges rather than sitting at the desk.


Anyway huge gratitude and relief that I have my gorgeous girl home, fairly intact and seemingly pain free - and I guess for that reason I will probably just be pathetically grateful and not express my extreme disatisfaction.................................................................................................